Symptom:		Drinking fails to give taste and satisfaction, beer is
			unusually pale and clear.
Problem:		Glass empty.
Action Required:	Find someone who will buy you another beer.

Symptom:		Drinking fails to give taste and satisfaction,
			and the front of your shirt is wet.
Fault:			Mouth not open when drinking or glass applied to
			wrong part of face.
Action Required:	Buy another beer and practice in front of mirror.
			Drink as many as needed to perfect drinking technique.
		-- Bar Troubleshooting